FORTY SIX !

Wow I can't believe I am 46 , I mean I don't feel like I am . Truth be told I feel much older at times. Constantly I am told I look younger. I used to believe it but now I think people just say that cause they feel that is what you want to hear. I spent the evening with my son the best gift I could ever receive. He is back at home with his mom and I am about to go to bed alone. Another year older and another year alone.The older I get the harder it seems to be alone.But what do I do about it? I know I can't be with anyone for reasons known only by my closest.I could never replace what is lost nor could I ever regain what is gone. The years go by and the lines on my face more prominent.My parents have aged and I am not far behind.Another year older , no candles no cake no balloons.

Comments

  1. this is late comment but i just went through a breakup after 12 years. i searched for broken man and there you are. i read some things but the rest are too painful to read at this time. i feel the same way, that ultimately what the breakup could hurt is my time with my child. our situations are different, there were no issues with fidelity, there are in fact big differences in that we were partners, not a married couple. but things play out the same - when two people give their hearts, two people get hurt when things end, and one person always hurts more than the other.

    hang in there - in a blink of an eye i am no longer that starry-eyed 20 some year old. i am almost 40 now, and volunteered to share custody AND pay spousal support for a while, even though legally i am not required to. sometimes i feel a fool.

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